trying to see

i want to see if it works.... ok lets see if she is working.

Not sure why

Sorry everyone... Not sure why my blog is not leaving me add spaces and Paragraphs in my blogs..

You make your life what it is....

So tonight as I was sitting back watching my families and all the joy they have been to me and thinking.. what could I have done better.. What could I have done better in my life. Many of you dont know what my dream was in life. I just wanted to be married, have a house in the good old valley, and grow old with children and grandchildren and sit on the front porch on a porch swing and just live my life out... OK I always wanted the front porch to sit on.. I dont know why I had such a small vision of what my life could ever have been. I quess I would have to say it is what I was raised with, watching the Mark family or the Tice family. I know that there was always more. As Jen said one time to me.. You grabbed a life and you ran.. and you ran far. I would owe that part to the Davis family. Tonight I had a small vision of something of what I had always wanted. I would not say that my family is disfuntional..... it was a family and when mother died "OUR FAMILY" died. I am telling you our family died. We had no longer done the things that our family had the things that I had been raised with were dead. So as I was sitting there tonight, I had just taught a message on optimism and is the glass half full or half empty, and I was thinking to myself.. wow I have such a full glass. YES I live with my glass full most of the time. I can sometimes think it is half empty but for the main part. I am a FULL glass and not half full but a full glass. I saw what I was sent here for. I know that they might not realize what they are to me. And I am so sad I have to live so far away from not only my family but some old friends as well.. BUT I am living a life that I am to be living. I do not know why But I have some great friends that will ALWAYS be my family. We were having a laugh tonight of how many times Ted has taken me to the hospital, and why I call Ted.. I made the joke that Ted is the only one that Answers the Phone when he see me calling. I dont know why.. But He has been a great friend so I want to thank him for that. Tonight as each family was sitting there, I saw my family. I saw the family that I need. I am not sure why the Lord has placed me in Seattle 3000 miles away from my sister, my brother, niece and nephew, and my great nephew and niece, and the grave of my parents. but this I am for sure... I know why the Lord had put me where I am at this Moment of time. Sure I know deep in my hearts of hearts I sat In Heaven before I came to this earth, and Said to my Heavenly Father. I will go and do they work for you on earth and I will go where you call me to go. OK I know it sounds like the song I be what you want me to be dear Lord.. But as I am doing this.. I am also learning I have a lesson to teach and to learn. Back to the families. I know I sat with them in Heaven and said to them.. Dont worry we will meet again some day and I promise you I will do What ever it takes to make sure we return to Our Heavely Father. I want to thank each of them for coming back into my life. I am feeling the time as they will be leaving me soon because School is ending and life must go on. I just really want to say Thank you for being the friends and family that you are to me. Thank you for your friendship and for the love you offer. YOU guys are the best and I will always be GRATEFUL for your love and support.

I have something wrong with me

OK I have to tell this story, some of you have heard it and some of you have lived it. YEARS ago and I mean years ago back in a small town in Pennsylvania, I was introduced to a food group that I was not to keen on.. ANY one of you guess what it is??? anyway as I was always taught that you eat what is on your plate. NO matter how BAD it is or what it tasted like. Well mine tasted like PASTE. yes PASTE.. oh come on now you all know what it tastes like because you all did it when you were in kindergarden or 1st grade. the good old WHITE school house paste. Well this is what It tasted like to me. PASTE. Well as life has gotten better for me I still have a hard time fixing PASTE. If you have not guessed it by now I am talking about Refried Beans. For many years I have not eatten them because it brings me back to that paste taste. and I have blogged about it before that I have started to like them. Well tonight as I was opening the cans of them for our dinner I found myself eatting them cold and out of the can... YES sick I know but I did it. the worst part is that when I was eatting my dinner I found myself eatting more of them than I would like to admit. And then I saw myself eatting them as I was putting them away after dinner and thinking to my self... "Self" because that is what I call myself. "Self" do you remember when you hated them. and thinking.. there must be something wrong with you. SO yes I will admit now I have something wrong with me.

WHAT I did

OK first off.. Thank you for all the support that I have recieved from My Elder's Quorum President.
Yesterday I had to teach on the word of wisdom. and well this is what I did.
I always teach in the GYM. larger I sit everyone in a circle so there is not a row where people can sleep.
Well I most of the time have a large table in the middle with something on it.
Yesterday IT was a few bottles of wine, beer, sodas coffee, Chocolate drugs, (prescription) and you get the visial here.

So I also had an empty glass and a bottle of FRE. Which is an Alcohol Free (Removed) wine.

I opened it up and Drank it in a wine glass.

I ruffled the feathers of that old mother HEN.

Ok I just want to clear something up here first. Fre has 0.05% per volume of Alcohol.
and Did you know Vanilla Pure Vanilla is 35% Alcohol. I also had that on the table.
And 10% Alochol or 20 Proof is in NyQuil. Just some facts.

so I always have cookies (CHOCOLATE CHIP) and this sunday I pass around Coke, Diet Coke and Spirit.

OK my point was to be made that NOT everything was appearance of evil. OK I did not do a good enough job.

Someone made comment that they were uncomfortable with what I was doing.
Some SISTER reported me to the Bishop
Some Brothern came up to me after the lesson and SAID WOW WOW WOW and said it was awesome.
Some Brother called me and told me I should be ashamed of HOW I taught the lesson and that I should be ashame of myself for owning all of this. and well you know...

When it comes right down to it. I pushed the limit, I am sorry that I caused Hate and discontent, and I will learn from this.

I did Ask to be released but I got a very warm letter back from my President saying you leave I leave. LOL (He will be my Bishop someday soon.)

I learned a lesson here that kept me up most of the night last night.
1st off you should learn from the spirt what you should teach and how you teach.
2nd AVIOD the appearance of Evil
3rd You never know who is watching you and wont get the whole story or all of the facts and REPORT you for unjust caused..
4th BE the example that Christ wants you to be!

Thank you for the many texts from my family that read this and said WHAT in the heck did you do and finally.. I have to give you a story I was going to use.


J.Golden Kimball:
The Prophet once asked Golden to take the new Deseret Sunday School President up the the Brigham City Conference. "His name is David O. McKay. he just got back from the Scottish mission." Golden agreed to escort the nice young fellow.
It was winter, they traveled all day and night by sled in the bitter cold. Finally, they arrived with an hour to spare before the meeting.
Golden thought he was going to die. He reasoned he needed a coffee-bad. So he innocently suggested they go over to the Idle Isle Restaurant for breakfast.
The aroma of hot coffee filled the little diner. WHen the waitress aksed the two gentlemen what they'd like, Brother McKay said, "some ham and eggs and two cups of hot choclate, please."
Golden excused himself and found the waitress who had taken their order. "would you mind putting a little coffee in my hot choclate, please" he asked. She said that would be OK they did it all the time up there.
the waitress came by a minute later with two steaming mugs and said, "Now which one of you wanted coffee in your Hot chocolate?"
Caught, Golden said, "Ah heck, put it in both of them." Brother McKay Laught uncontollably.

OK I did it good this time...

Ok really I did it good this time and well maybe its time for a change.

SO I have been able to teach in the elders quorum for the past few years.. maybe it is a time for me to be released and called to NOTHING...
any way to day I pushed a little to far. I made people uncomfortable. to the part that they said so in class and they sat there the rest of the class with there hand over their face because a I am teaching and well they did not approve about what I was doing.

I taught the word of wisdom. I pushed the bar a little to close for comfort.

I am sorry I taught they way I taught.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

there is something about it that I have always enjoyed St. Patrick's Day. must be the wearing of the green and seeing green is one of my colors that must be what its all about.

Or the fact that I love Holidays so that I can cook my theme meals around certain foods... or it is the fact that it's Abby's birthday.

Happy Birthday Abby. I could not go by without saying happy birthday to you. I remember when we were in college, I believe I made you a chocolate mint cake for your birthday!

Any way I hope you my dear sister have a great year! I hope you celebrate in style this year. I hope you remember that you are loved and that you know how much I love you for your great example and for the person you are!

Love you Abby.... Happy St Patrick Day Birthday to you!