I am as old as a TREE

I am as old as a TREE

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Not sure why...

Not sure why I am feeling the way I am. 2 weeks ago I did Easter and I had a blast... so WHY am I feeling the way I am feeling tonight.

last night I started to chat with Jen about FAMILY... Oh I know I am the one that has to change and make my life the way I want it to be. But I am feeling a little missed and sometimes I am missing all the fun.. and well... that All I can really say.

I do not know why or what is causing me to feel a little blue tonight. Trust me.. I am kind of glad that I dont have the stress I have been having and that I am somewhat relaxed tonight. I made 2 Peanut Butter French silk pies and I have no one coming over for dinner tomorrow because I have to work. Tell me what the heck is that all about.

maybe it is the fact that I have not had family over for the last 2 sundays and I am missing it. I said that when Ted and Shelby leave and Cam and Lane leave I was done. I might not be. I might have to do it because I need it in my life. Maybe that is why I have been blue the last few days.

I guess I am not truely happy unless I am serving someone or doing something for someone else. It's odd to say that because I really think sometimes I want to be selfless. really... I just want it all to be about me... me... me... me...

It's odd feeling this way and I know that this is not me. but I fight with myself sometimes and just say WHY not me.

anyway I know its sad that I am writing this down, but sometime I just have to write what is on my mind.


dad said...

Don't dwell on it, tomorrow will be a better day. It works for me.

Anonymous said...

COME HOME! Love, mom

Abby said...

Nothing wrong with feeling blue. Embrace it, feel it, and know that just as it as in the past, it doesn't last forever. You know from past experience that you will feel better, and when you do, you'll appreciate it all the more because you'll remember the blue days. Love you.